Thank you, Children

To my beloved Children,

Thank you. Did you know that you were the ones that gave me a reason to listen to my body, my inner knowing? Learning to listen to you taught me to listen to me because you started inside of me. I began to seek my inner knowing because of you. You and my inner knowing were so closely related, seeking you meant I learned how to seek me. I began to quiet all the noises outside and sink into myself. Pregnancy and birth taught me I could trust myself and my instincts.

I didn’t realized how much having you in my life would teach me and shape me. I thought I would be the one teaching and shaping you. But you don’t need to do quite as much unlearning as I do. You haven’t learned to dismiss what your body, your inner knowing is telling you. You are the one that knows how to listen more than me. Thank you for showing me.

Thank you for feeling your feelings. I have learned how to hide my emotions and suppress my feelings. You don’t know how to do that and I am grateful. You show me when life is too much. You can’t hide that you are hungry or tired. You are like a canary in the coal mine. Listening to you keeps us all thriving.

I think about the times when you are upset. To me you appear cranky and whiney and clingy. You can’t contain your big feeling and you lash out. Sometime in those moments, I forget to look deeper and I just want you to stop. I want you to control and suppress those big feelings. I am sorry. You and your big feelings are important. They are prophetic. They are sacred. Life is moving too fast. Your big feelings remind me that connectedness is the priority. Our humanity, not our striving for perfection, is most important.

Dear children, you teach me to rediscover my humanity. Thank you. That is the most beautiful gift I have ever received. I hope in future moments, I can remember to treasure too.